2020 was rough… However, I’m definitely not mad about it.

I remember chatting with my two C’s… We were talking about having the best 2020 ever. Things were shifting for everyone. Well, the people that I know. Everything from career changes to winning a huge payment from a scratch off. I started paying attention to what people were telling me. I did listen…. I’m writing this blogpost today.

I don’t know what it was. Maybe, the people that I’ve been spending time with. Was I finally growing a pair of balls? I really don’t know… Yes! I actually do!! Midlife crisis started hitting me. Also, I was coming out of a depression. I have started projects in the past. I would never finish them. Or, if it would take off. I would back out of it. I’m playing catch up now. Ugh! I remember sitting at a lunch meeting. When it came for me to speak… “I want to go part time, maybe two days a week.” The table was shocked. That’s right… I shook that shit! Strange thing… The effective date was supposed to be March 16th. We were shut down on the 13th.

I’ve sat around and low-key panicked for about two weeks. I’m already skinny.. losing twelve pounds wasn’t a good look. I gave up cigarettes cold turkey. Which increased my THC intake. Trust me.. It’s definitely working. I seriously owe Chad for the advice. Thankfully, I have a support system and saved money. After the two week panic attack. I’ve joined numerous zoom parties and calls. Many of the people on the call were truly inspiring. I’ve known a few of them for a while. Some I’ve just met and we’ve become great friends.

With that said…. I’ve learned a lot about people. Your family and friends aren’t really your family and friends. Especially, when you’re single and home alone. You’re calling people that you know damn well aren’t doing anything. However, when outdoor seating rolled around. You want to link up. Ummmm, NO!!! Same with family members.. The jokes when I would keep my mask on. I would show up with gloves on and everything. I was told that I’m taking this way too serious. Hello!!! People are dying, you clowns!!!! Some were even having parties. Are you kidding me? I’m good!! I’m permanently social distancing myself. Shout out to Clara!!! She has kept me sane through this. As well as, helping me get through hell. Anyway, I tried dating this summer. That was the worst. I’m sure many of us dated the first person that asked. Don’t!!

I started watching videos of myself from back in the day. I was performing in night clubs. I’ve done a few acting projects. I’ve missed this dude, so much! What happened to this kid? Being locked in the house made me think. I totally was beating myself up about a lot of things. It was hindering my sight of who I was. If people today are telling me that I should start a blog and YouTube channel. I’ve been hearing this for many years. I was working 60 hours a week. Just avoiding what I needed to face. Suddenly, I’m gifted tons of equipment. I was taught how to use Garage Band. A friend has taken me under their wing.

It’s now December 31, 2020. I’m a lot more confident. I’m having the time of my life blogging. I’m getting comfortable with YouTube. I’ve learned how to say NO. I’m standing up for myself. I’m very selective about people. No more just letting people in. I’m eating a hell of a lot better. I’m believe in exercise. I’ve learned how to budget and save money. I’ve learned how to invest and flip. I know what sleeping actually feels like. I’m going to give dating a try. I’m found an app that isn’t sketchy. At least, it doesn’t seem like it.

Have a Happy, Blessed and Successful 2021!! Thank you all for your support!!!

Author: Chazz.

Just some skinny pizza eating freak from Brooklyn. A lot of people say that I'm awesome. Which is dope! Now I want the universe to think so too.

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